If at first you don't succeed, it's probably because you're a moron, so there's no sense in trying again. 95% of people fail at over 50% of the ventures they start in life. That's a 145% chance of failure total. It's best to just play it safe and not come out of your home today. If you do not have a home, either due to the current mortgage crisis or because you snorted away everything of value in your life, including all your friends and family, it's probably high time you made a commitment to that empty promise you've been making to yourself for quite sometime. Or, as luck would have it, you could be part of the select -45% today whose lives are about to change for the better, forever. If your birthday falls on a Wednesday or a Saturday this calendar year, thank your maker, a break is heading your way. All other days beware, and if your operating on a fiscal year instead...get a life!
Here's a video that pretty much sums up your entire existence. Enjoy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbOC0uoKYtU
Photo Courtesy of http://the-op.com
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